I just finished up chai-latte time with a great new friend, and got to thinking about how we meet people. I have noticed, since moving to Austin, that the “new-friend” cards have aligned suspiciously well on a number of occasions. What is it about certain people that brings them together? Coincidence is too common to blame, but I don’t buy into the whole “destiny” thing either. We are stronger than “coincidence;” we are bigger than “destiny.” There must be some technique to not only meeting people, but to meeting people you actually want to be friends with — to meeting interesting, passionate people with similar values and compatible personalities.
There is a saying, “Be the kind of person you would like to meet.” When I reflect on how I have made my closest friends, I am reminded of how much I have changed since starting college. Of course, I will continue to change throughout my adult life, but at 24, I feel that I have truly become myself. I have identified and defined my passions and values. I know who I am and what I believe to be important.
My closest friends view me as outgoing, confident, fearless and fun (please forgive me for forgetting to include narcissistic). Perhaps I am these things, and perhaps I am not, but you can be certain that the friends I have made — the people I have surrounded myself with — beam these characteristics. They are intellectual and determined. They are athletic and adventurous. They teach me, and challenge me, and inspire me.
How lucky I am to have such friends!
But my friendships are not simply luck. Each of these relationships will last forever because they are built on the solid foundation of having confidence in who you are. Real, true relationships are intentional. “Good things come to those who go out and f-ing get it!” I met these extraordinary people by making it a goal to become extraordinary. Like youthfulness, confidence is a choice. You can choose to be anxious and reserved, or you can choose to be fearless and fun.
So what are you afraid of? We are all adults here. Embarrassment should be reserved solely for teenagers…those awkward kinda-humans’ brain chemistry is so out of whack that they cannot recognize that nothing in this world is worth feeling anxious if it keeps you from doing what you want to do, and going where you want to go, and speaking with whom you want to speak. We “grown-ups” have no excuse. Frankly, if an adult has the balls to outwardly make fun of another adult for trying, it is probably because they are seriously lacking elsewhere (*ehem).
Let us all go confidently. Let us all become who we are. Let us all be “strong enough, brave enough, or stupid enough to go after what we want,” because when we do these things, we will find ourselves surrounded by people who are equally inspiring. Cheers!
A few of the greats:
(to those wonderful people who did not make this week’s slideshow, sorry…I love you too…You know who you are)